”Every relationship should be an honest reflection of yourself”
If you’re in a relationship but you’ve grown to the point that you feel pain, distance, struggles, issues of emotional or sexual nature, quarrels, etc etc…
Than it’s time to think about what your next step should be.
Making a decision isn’t easy, knowing what you really want is sometimes hard to recognize when you are completely absorbed into a relationship to the point you’ve lost yourself. If communication is difficult between the both of you than it’s hard to understand where each individual is struggling with.
Astrology is a helpful tool in understanding, however you should act out of reality, and not necessary out of ‘yeh but our moons are opposite and my mercury is square to his moon’ . Sure those aspects are SHIT. I feel your struggle, and that’s why i am writing this article. To help others who are facing an important decision of whether to breakup or to makeup.
I suggest you to read my 10 laws of love before diving deeper.
You should have good understanding of what healthy love is like.
1) Important questions to ask yourself :
1. What is the reason that you stay?
2. Do you feel understood ?
3. Are you sexually fulfilled?
4. Can you communicate about everything?
5. Do you feel comfortable & safe?
6. Do you feel like your partner knows you?
7. Do you feel supported?
8. Do you feel respected?
9. Is it friendship or love?
10. Is there emotional understanding?
11. Are you happy?
12. Are you sad, why?
13. Can you show your most vulnerable self?
14. Do you receive the right kind of support when you feel low?
15. Are you both working on a strong relationship?
16. Is your partner the only one on your mind & heart?
17. Is there a soul connection?
18. Do you reflect your partner’s feelings onto yourself?
19. Is giving & receiving in balance?
Take your time to answer these. If you can answer these rather quickly and most of them turn out to be negative, than you are one step closer to knowing why you should make a decision of breaking up. However for some it takes a lot of time inorder to tune in to their real needs and desires.
2) Signs of being in love :
List down your own behavior when you are truly in love. Sure the butterflies may calm down after some time, that’s pretty normal. However i believe it’s important to analyze yourself and really know what you feel when you are in love. I will list down mine, to give you an honest example. Be brutally honest.UNFILTERED
• Writing poems and sweet texts
• Getting horny out of nowhere
• Getting horny from his voice
• Getting horny from his kisses and hugs
• Feeling free
• Wanting to give surprises and gifts
• Wanting to marry instantly
• Being happy all the time
• Dick worship
• Being completely open and honest
• Can’t shut up about him
• Being and feeling proud
… Now list your signs down. See what pops out of that and does it show in your current relationship? Double check yourself, when you are doing any of these signs, if they really come out of love OR out of a need to replace something! Sometimes we have the tendency to copy & paste certain behavior from the past, because we want to feel that love, we want to make ourselves believe that we are in love, while sometimes it’s just an ache of pain in which we try to make something real what is not there..
3) What does your astrology show :
1. Check your transits to have a better understanding of why you feel so unsatisfied in your current relationship.
• Shortterm transits : transiting planets (Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars). Hard aspects from these planets to any of your personal planets (especially Moon, Venus, Mars, Mercury) only take up to a few weeks and have a few days of being very intense when the aspect is exact.
• Longterm transits : transiting planets (Uranus, Neptune, Saturn, Pluto). Hard aspects from these planets to any of your personal planets (Moon, Sun, Venus, Mars, Mercury, Jupiter) can be VERY challenging to overcome and drag yourself through.
• T Saturn square Venus : Creates a time of emotional and sensual distance in your relationship. It could possibly result in a breakup, especially if the foundation of the relationship isn’t that strong, such as good communication and emotional understanding.
It challenges the relationship. If you and your lover survive this than it only strengthens the relationship, if a breakup does occur under this transit, than better things will come in your future, just not directly, since Saturn is about restrictions. This transit causes a time of lowered self-esteem and difficulty in receiving love. So if you see this transit happening and you are going through a rough time in your relationship, this is where you can find the answer and understanding why you feel this way.
• T Pluto square Venus : Causes breakups of painful nature. It’s a true transformation and money could come into play with this specific transit. It’s a necessary period of inner growth which often results in symbolic death and rebirth. If your relationship survives this transit than intimacy may increase between the both of you, it makes room for a new chapter or level to arrive in your relationship.
• T Uranus square Venus : Creates a time in which sexual needs may change between the both of you. One or both are no longer satisfied within the relationship. This aspect causes friction in commitment because it makes the individual(s) long for more freedom and new adventures which the current relationship may not serve or live up to. Cheating could be a result of this transit, either you or the partner, but it doesn’t necessary always have to be cheating. It could just show a time in which both of you realize that the relationship doesnt live up or serve any satisfaction in the area of sex, love and sensuality.
• T Neptune square Venus : This transit could result in cheating most likely. Neptune is illusions, secrets and in combination it could bring secret affaires, however these affaires will most likely lead nowhere since it’s a one-direction affaire in which one individual feels the need to take it to the next level. It could result in lying and distance is created between you both in which you don’t understand what is going on. Neptune is the opposite of reality and doesn’t leave much room for putting things into perspective. It makes up his own reality which in the end is just an illusion.
4) What’s in your Synastry and Composite :
Sometimes the issues you are feeling in your relationship, are clearly shown in the Synastry and/or Composite chart.
A few examples in Synastry :
• Moon square/opposite Moon
• Moon square/opposite Venus
• Moon square/opposite Mars
• Mercury square/opposite Mercury
• Mercury square/opposite Venus
• Mercury square/opposite Jupiter
• Mars square/opposite Mars
• Mars square/opposite Pluto
• Mars square/opposite ASC or ASC ruler
A few examples in Composite :
• 5th ruler square/opposite 8th ruler
• Saturn square/opposite Sun
• Saturn square/opposite/conjunct Moon
• Saturn square/opposite/conjunct Venus
• Saturn square/opposite/conjunct Mars
• Mercury square/opposite Mars
• Moon in 6th or 12th house
• Moon square Sun
• Sun square/opposite Jupiter
• 12th house stellium
• Hard aspects to the ASC by Saturn/Uranus/Neptune/Pluto/Mars
There are many factors which can show why something isn’t working out with your sweetheart, sometimes we want it to break, but sometimes we don’t really want it because there is still something present in which you feel ‘Aahhh.. this person really has qualities that i admire and need, the affection is sweet but the communication sucks’ .
Yes.. i recognize this one very well.
Think again. The most important factors in a relationship inorder for it to work:
6) Emotional compatibility
9) Balanced compromising
10) Common goals
12) Sexual attraction
Most of these SHOULD be present. Sure, i know some couples can live in a platonic relationship, it depends on both of your needs.
Hope this article helps. Feel free to contact me.